I held the burgundy booklet in my hand, turning it over like it might disappear.

Malta. European Union. My name printed in block letters under the golden emblem.

It was 2020. Six years after I first landed on this island thinking I'd stay maybe a year, maybe two. Six years after I thought love would be enough to make a place feel like home.

The passport arrived three months after my application. I had become officially Maltese. 

The Weight of a Document

A passport is supposed to be freedom, right? The ability to cross borders, to leave when you want, to return when you choose. But for me, it was proof of love and other things. 

I got married in 2015 Valentines Day with a Maltese Woman - I never suggest you to get married on Valentines Day - In 2020 I have applied for the citizenship and I got in 3 months. Because everything was real, legit, there was no any suspicious thing, but love. I got it because I deserved it. 

"You don't belong to Malta. Malta belongs to you now. You earned it."

What They Don't Tell You About "Visa-Free Access"

The brochures say 190 countries. The citizenship agencies use it as a selling point. "Malta passport = global mobility!" Voila. Sure. Technically true.

But here's what they don't say: A passport doesn't erase the past. It doesn't make immigration officers smile at you if your travel history looks chaotic. It doesn't protect you from being pulled aside for "random additional screening." And today bye bye to Passport by investment. You can only get a passport by merit which means you must have a pure talent or you must be a someone that Malta should truly desire. 

I've been to 30+ countries on this passport. Sometimes it's smooth. Sometimes the border guard looks at my birthplace (Turkey), looks at my citizenship (Malta), looks at me, and decides I need extra questions.

"Why Malta?" they ask.

I want to say: Because I survived something you wouldn't believe.

Instead, I say: "I live there."

The Day I Used It in Wrong Way. 

Gosh this is very funny and dramatic story actually. When you are a dual citizenship sometimes you have to learn the things with mistake. I went to Turkey and entered with my Maltese Passport and planned to return Malta through Cyprus (Greek Side) because I could have come from there anymore. As maybe some you don't know that Turkish Citizens can't enter Cyprus without their visa. Because they are not in Schengen and you can't travel to Cyprus from Turkey because there is no flight, you can't also get visa, because there is no embassy. Politics. What You can do about it? 

Anyway. I went to Cyprus (Turkish Side) from my hometown but entered with my Turkish Passport. Idiot. I spent one night and next day when I went to border, police told me "You can't enter Cyprus, because you entered to Turkey with Maltese Passport and left it with Turkish one. You are stuck my friend."

I did not know that rule until that time but at least I was charming and go getter guy and they said "OK"  So I made this mistake, you should not do it. Dual Citizenship 101.  Today I am in my 12th years on the Island and I love Malta more than many origins. I sometimes miss old days, literally everything. Those where the days. 

What Freedom Actually Looks Like

I'm not going to list 190 countries here. You can Google that. What I'll tell you instead is this: Freedom isn't about where you CAN go. It's about knowing you're not trapped.

When you have one passport - one country, one identity, one system - you live with a quiet fear. What if the government changes? What if the laws shift? What if you need to leave?

Malta citizenship gave me options. Not just travel options. Life options.

I can live anywhere in the EU. I can work remotely from Bali without visa drama. I can visit family in Turkey without worrying my Turkish passport will cause issues elsewhere, but there Malta is my home and it will always be. The fact that; it's not about using the access. It's about having it.

The Absurdity of Borders

Albert Camus wrote about the absurd: the confrontation between human need and the unreasonable silence of the world. Aye! Borders are absurd. You're born on one side of a line, and that determines where you can go, where you can work, who you can become. You didn't choose it. You just got dealt a hand.

Malta gave me a way to reshuffle the deck. Not because Malta is perfect. It's not. It's a small island with big bureaucracy and complicated people. But it gave me something I didn't have before: the ability to leave.

And paradoxically, once I could leave, I chose to stay. I have 2 beautiful kids and they are my everything in this world. I can burn Malta for them. I am happy for them because They' ll never know what it's like to queue for hours at a visa application center. To explain yourself to consular officers who decide your worth based on your bank statement. They'll take it for granted. And that's the point.

Freedom should be boring. It should be unremarkable.

The Truth About "Visa-Free Travel"

Here's what I learned after years of holding this passport:

The document opens doors. But you still have to walk through them. The Malta passport gets you into 190 countries. But it doesn't make you brave enough to go. It doesn't heal the trauma of fighting for the right to stay somewhere. I know people with 5 passports who never leave their home country.

And I know people with one passport who've seen the world.

The passport is a tool. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Why I'm Telling You This

Because every citizenship agency will sell you numbers. 190 countries! Top 10 passport! Global mobility! But they won't tell you what it feels like to hold a document that represents survival, not just travel.

They won't tell you that sometimes, freedom is heavy.

They won't tell you that the most valuable thing about a second passport isn't where it lets you go - it's that it lets you choose where you belong. Malta didn't choose me. I fought to stay. And in fighting, I became part of it. The passport is just proof.

FreeMalta has the data: visa-free countries, stay durations, border crossing realities. But data doesn't tell you why it matters. Only lived experience does.